Category Archives: Humor

Lance Armstrong, Cycling, Etc

“Does Lance Armstrong enjoy cycling? Of course he does! He has a ball!”

I saw this one today, written by Kuruis, on Reddit Jokes, got a laugh, wanted to pass it along, so here it is…lol

I am lurking the web, newspapers, movies, and documentaries mining for material to go into my next blog entry. The jokes help keep things into perspective. Sometimes, I try too hard to come up with an entry, and write a bunch of crap, or nothing at all.

Thanks to everyone who has, and is still supporting me in this time of difficult transition, in my life. Having Crohns Disease, and all the body falling apart problems 28 years of it entails is a harsh reality, in and of itself. Adding the marriage breakup to the mix, makes for some real crappy days. Thanks to all of you for cruising my blog, and sending the well wishes.

This too shall pass.

Cheers,

mark – aka still need a car to get back and forth to doctors’ appointments – armyveteran ūüėČ

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Filed under Blogging, Crohns Disease, Humor, Life as a Disabled Veteran, Personal, Sports

Thank You!!

Thanks for the overwhelming positive response to my last post regarding the additions of a Page 2, and a Page 3, to my blog. I have never had 50 plus likes on any post I have made. I am ecstatic over the positive reception, to the descriptions, of ¬†additions, I will soon be making to “armyveteran”.

As with so many undertakings, when one is trying to make something better, unexpected things happen.  Delays are the norm when one is waiting for another writer to submit their work. I am hoping to have the work from my wife within a week. Then I will be lining up other guest writers, and making a contribution, or three, of my own.

The “Page 3” material is in a state of flux. Part of this material will be photographs, from a really nice digital camera, I recently purchased. It is the most powerful camera I have ever used, and I have not even put the batteries in it, nor have I uploaded its disk, to my computer. I will just have to get over my fear of this powerful camera, and just use it. Another thing holding me back is the intensely hot weather here in Florida. The weather is the norm, for this time of year. I am just getting older, and the Crohns Disease is robbing me of ever more physical capacities, such as the ones needed to go out, in the heat, and capture summer photographs. The weather will be moderating, hopefully, in a couple of months. I can always go out early in the morning, or late at night, and take my photographs, at those times, until the weather cools down, as I am able.¬†The rest of “Page 3” will be made up of jokes, and humorous essays written by me, and borrowed from other sources. Of course, I will give credit, where credit is due.

Once again, thanks for the great response, to the proposed changes, on my blog. I wanted to let you all know I am still implementing them, but have some issues, which I have outlined in the above paragraphs.

Once again, thanks for all the support.

mark

 

 

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Filed under Blogging, Creative Writing, Crohns Disease, Humor, Life as a Disabled Veteran, Personal, Weather

New Things Coming To This Space – SOON!!!

I am seriously considering adding a second page, to my blog. It will be titled, “Page 2”. I know, why add a page when I do not write regularly, on page one? My writing, or lack thereof, has much to do with my style, and technique. If I am not inspired to write, have not a good topic, and force something onto the page, it sucks! I am the type needing a bit of inspiration to bang out a decent story, on my laptop. I know, the rule is write, write, and write some more, even if you have to force it. I do not like rules.

Regarding page two, I plan to utilize guest writers, covering a wide range of topics. My wife will be writing the first¬†entry. Anyone wanting to submit a page two article, please send me a message. I will be writing on there too. I need to better define page 1, and perhaps will filter the remainder over to page two, and…..

A page 3 is in the works too. I plan to use it for off beat stuff,  weird news, some of me photography (I got a NEW camera), and to put a joke, or three, along with some funny stories, written by yours truly.

Stay tuned. The best is yet to come!

mark

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Filed under Art, Blogging, Creative Writing, Humor, Personal, Poetry, Spiritual

Florida Gives Tim Tebow Highest Honor

Update from the Capitol of Florida, Tallahassee – The State Legislature has passed a bill, over the weekend,¬† that will require the State of Florida to be carved into¬†the form¬†of Tim Tebow, in his infamous Tebowing pose, replacing the¬†current gun shape the state now has.¬†The Governor, Rick Scott, (who is from the future)¬†has assured the people he will sign¬†the “Gun to Tebowing¬†Re-Shaping of Florida Bill”,¬†into law. The Legislature found the power to enact the legislation, in an archaic portion of the State Constitution, left over from the time of Spain’s Colonial governance of Florida. With that part of the Constitution being written in Latin, the language of old Catholicism, the religion of Spain, no one understood what it said, and it was left in the pre-amble of the State Constitution, for sentimental reasons. Recently, when the Pope visited Cuba, Florida sent a delegation to ask him what these archaic¬†Latin words meant, and he told them it means they can do whatever the hell they want to do. Funding for the massive project, which will gobble up entire cities, is to come from replacing whole milk in kids lunches with homogenized cat milk, and the elimination of¬†grades 6-12. The Governor was quoted saying “Our kids, and the toothless inbred hicks, in the northern parts of the state, are either too damned drunk¬† on moonshine, religion, or both,¬†to learn anything beyond the 5th Grade, so why bother trying anymore?”. Sources¬†in the Governors office said it will be easier to rule over the people if they do not get all uppity with Secondary, and High School educations, and this will save bundles of money because it is¬†cheaper to rule the¬†ignorant, than it is to rule the educated. ¬†It is also being reported that anyone caught not Tebowing 5 times a day will be taken out and shot; furthermore, everyone¬†receiving State¬†welfare assistance¬†will be exported to New York where they will get proper food, dental care, and be allowed to live in the Jets/Giants Stadium.

Giant’s personnel are reportedly pissed off to high heaven, and are demanding their own stadium, and threatening to move to California, if this is allowed to happen.¬†When the Jet’s organisation was informed of this, they merely Tebowed until everyone tired of watching them.¬†The¬†entire New York Press Corps¬†set¬†off to Florida, to watch Oceanfront communities be dynamited, to make way for the bold new Tebowing state of the South!

The New York Press also intends to folllow the charter trains, and buses full of Floridians, on the dole, back to New York, lest they get captured by a group of inbred toothless northern Floridians, as so many other Yankess have in the past. They is now us, and we is now them.

ūüėÄ

mark

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Filed under Art, Blogging, Creative Writing, Humor, Personal